As we start to move towards the completion of cleaning up Tom's place and sorting out his many collections, mementos, and personal belongings, we start to hit the hard questions regarding what to do with the many pieces of history which he held on to.
Some things are easy. His kitchen was full of junk - the food got tossed (most was expired), the dishware, cookware, appliances were nothing special. We donated anything salvageable. We took a few things (brother Kevin took a tiny cleaver). But mostly, gone.
Clothes too, mostly tossed or donated. Tom held on to clothes that were out of style, no longer fit, etc. for decades. There were various gifts, unworn, with tags affixed. We tossed what was soiled or torn, donated what was decent. I took a small collection of Falcon Ridge staff tee-shirts (mine were used to make a quilt, so the replacements were welcomed). But mostly, the clothes were easy to sort through.
The collections too - easy. Tom had a lot of firearms and ammo; most of that got sold. A pair of pearl handled revolvers went to nephew and his wife (who live in TX). A handgun went to a friend who helped make safe, sort and get the collection ready for sale. And a beautiful rifle (I'm not a gun person, but when I saw this gun I was impressed with the workmanship and clean lines) went to brother Kevin who bought it for Tom. The firearms cleared a good chunk of change.
The 700+ N-gauge locomotives and rolling stock, not so much, going for perhaps 10% on the dollar. The knives are out on consignment, but will not be an easy sell; he set aside some Buck Knives to give to cousins at the family reunion, and set some of his special knives aside (maybe we'll toss them in the grave when we bury him, like ancient warlords). The slot cars went to Kevin (for now) who wanted the track and a few cars for his son, but ended up taking the wall rack with 200 or so cars - not expecting much return, like the trains. We picked over his hats, donated the rest. We found scores of pieces of career keepsakes - nametags, pins, badges, insignia - we'll keep one piece of each type for the archives, toss the rest.
A large DVD collection (325 titles) were donated to DVDs to the Troops - which matches up deployed troops with DVD collections. Cost us $100 or so to box them up and ship them, but well worth it. We put a small note in each box about Tom. A while later we discovered a large VHS collection; still not disposed of. Hoping to drop off at a shop in MA that advertises for them (no money needed, just want to keep them out of the landfill if possible). His records, cassettes, and CDs were sold (along with his turntable, the real gem I think) for $200.
Three sets of golf clubs (one set to brother-in-law TQ, the others consigned), two ball gloves, a tired football, golf shoes, a dart board, two rolling tool chests, an air compressor - all consigned. Compound bow and arrows (give to relative? consign?).
Now, on to the hard stuff. Tom had a bin and a few piles of treasures - baby book, family photos, etc. that have made their way into the family archives (a bin I'm curating, and have recently had to enlarge). Yearbooks were harder - his HS yearbooks we're keeping (he's in the two he has), his college yearbooks will be sold or donated (he's not in either). Three books from dad's military career (naval officer school, two cruise books from the carriers Essex and Shangri-La are a harder call (might sell, might keep). I've got a few hours of organizing and filing that bin. which now contains keepsakes from Dad, Mom, and Tom.
A special jacket (replica he had made up, based on Dad's frayed, worn, and long trashed navy aviator's jacket, festooned with patches from his ships, units, and cruises) is sort of the hot potato - nobody really wants it, but nobody is willing to get rid of it. There's a crocheted afghan that mom made up for him which is in a pile for me; I realized yesterday that I'll soon own three of Mom's handiwork - I have one squirreled away that was a wedding gift, mom made my ex Alex one which he's giving to me as he divests from stuff, and now Tom's. I don't dare use them so long as Elo is around (he'd trash 'em) but he'll be moving on soon enough. Maybe bring one to the reunion in case anyone wants something from Mom.
Pretty much everything else is going to donate or toss via (800) Got-Junk. Mom and Dad's headboard / footer (trashed beyond use, although he had been using them plus their 50+ year old mattress and boxspring). A bookshelf I recognize from being in my bedroom as a child (buh-bye). The family dining room hutch (which lived in my office once upon a time, I remember having legos and keepsakes in there) - gone (the matching buffet is Kevin's aquarium stand, the table and chairs long gone).
By all accounts, Tom's place is pretty close to being empty. I've got one more trip north scheduled for next Tuesday to pick up strays. After that, we're done. Less than a month. We're nothing if not efficient in our grief and complicated emotions....
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