Oscar Nominated Films (and a few strays)

Colin McEnroe recently blogs:

I’m starting to believe the people who say 2013 is one of the great years for movies. Having recently piled “Dallas Buyers Club” and “Nebraska” on top of the long list of other last year releases viewed, I’m starting to see this as a crop that just keeps yielding.

And who am I to argue with him? I've been seeing a lot of movies myself this awards season. It's not something I do every year, but this year the combination of frigid weather, work schedule, interesting movies, and a fairly dormant (dare I say, comatose) social life has drawn me to the big screen more often. And while my normal movie watching generally is about 60% Real Art Ways, 10% Cinestudio, 10% mainstream movies, and 10% Out Film Fest, I've been out to the local multiplex (in provincial Berlin CT, matinees at the Starplex run until 6 pm and cost $5 - very affordable for the self employed with a flexible schedule).

So, with Oscar season around the corner, here is a listing of what I've seen, what I've liked, and what I've missed. Although I'm trying not to drop too many big plot bomb, there are probably a few spoilers following, so be warned.

In no particular order:

America Hustle: Did not expect to go see this, but what a treat. A double feature with Dallas Buyers Club would have worked in terms of bringing back the fashion, cars, and vibe of my youth. Loved the story, loved the music. Jennifer Lawrence was awesome in a "not the Hunger Games" role. Christian Bale was so deeply lost in a role as insane as Andy Kaufman's Tony Clifton alter ego, that I needed to wait for the credits to see who it was.  Totally not something I would ordinarily go see, but it was a total joy to watch.

Dallas Buyers Club: Confession, I went to see how problematic Jared Leto's portrayal of transwoman Rayon was. In fact, Leto did a great job, and was really such a secondary character. Loved Matthew McConaughey, loved the 80's vibe, Jennifer Garner was great. Totally loved it. 

Gravity: I could totally have done without the star power (Clooney and Bullock carry so many of their roles with them, I think I liken it to the Uncanny Valley phenomenon wherein a human features look and move almost, but not exactly, like natural human beings, causing a negative response) and there were enough technical holes in the plot to fuel a half dozen web sites.  But it was nevertheless a visual thrill ride in 3D ($8 at the Starplex matinee) 

Her: Another one I might have skipped, but for some positive reviews and comments from friends. Joaquin Phoenix was great in a role that vibed John Hodgeman; Scarlet Johansson's vocal work was perfect, and there's Amy Adams again (also in American Hustle). As a "be here now" yoga teacher, seeing all those folks with their noses in their PDA's, interactive video games, etc. was a little unsettling, but I liked the idea of the sentient operating systems evolving and deciding what to do about that in a way that did not involve Skynet and Terminators. Call it dystopia lite.

Nebraska: Just saw this one tonight (Oscar nomination brought it back to Berlin) and I was totally charmed. Not 100% sure that the decision to use black-and-white was perfect (or at least, required) - although there were some really amazing landscape and townscape shots that probably would not have worked as well. I kind of wanted a 70s era instagram filter for the thing. While Bruce Dern is getting kudos for his portrayal, I was much more interested in Wil Forte (familiar to this nerd as Jenna's cross-dressing love interest in 30 Rock). Loved the film, in a lot of ways,

Blue Jasmine: I saw this when it first came out. Did not wow me (if I recall correctly) and so very dark in a lot of ways (except cinematography, if memory serves it was a pretty bright film, in terms of light and color). Alec Baldwin does not seem right for a lot of roles, but her he was. And Cate Blanchette's journey through the film  was hard to watch.

Frozen: The only thing that kept this from being perfect for me was the damn snowman. Get rid of that "we gotta sell toys" candy-ass Ewok / Jar-Jar Binks plot excuse for a snowman and put a ghostly Miyazaki silent snowman in there, and it would have been awesome. But it was still pretty great. A few odd plot points (I totally got Ana's loss of her beloved big sister, not so much Elsa's trauma and fear), but so much ran pleasantly counter to the typical Disney princess meets prince plot. And if the songs made it seem like Wicked II (I was mentally comparing the songs as I watched, Idina Menzel's lovely voice only made it more pointed), that's not a bad thing. I'd go see it again....

Despicable Me II:  OK, it's been a while. When the original came out I never saw it, not really a Steve Carell fan, and my loss (happily rented it after seeing the sequel). The Minions were amazing in their whimsy, slapstick, and irreverence - Harpo Marx meets the Oompah-Loompahs, and cranked up to 11.

 
Inside Llewyn Davis: There's a lot not to like here (Greenwich Village seems kind of sanitized and empty), but a lot to like also. Here, Justin Timberlake gets lost in his supporting role, it was fun to grab all the musical characters and plop them into my knowledge of the nascent folk scene, I loved the "wrap around itself" plot device. Even the cat, which could have been a cloying and annoying bit, was deftly and amusing employed. "Oh Brother Where Art Though" seemed a lot more contrived, to me (there's Clooney again, unable to escape his celebrity)

Saving Mr. Banks: Tom Hanks might have the same sort of problems for me that Clooney does (hell, I remember his breakout role in Bosom Buddies, much as I try to forget) but for whatever reason, he does not. He was great here, Emma Thompson was similarly awesome, and I much enjoyed the period piece (Mad Men without the alcohol and sex) and the behind the scenes look at one of my childhood memories (the Sherman brothers were great, and love to see Bradley Whitford in anything, West Wing actors are beloved). I was a bit young to see Mary Poppins when it first came out but I am sure I saw in on Wonderful World of Disney, and perhaps from the back of my parent's ranch wagon at the drive-in. 

Finally, Twenty Feet from Stardom: Another mental double-bill for me, along with this year's Muscle Shoals (not nominated). Both were great looks back to rock n' roll history, and if Muscle Shoals was a bit more relatable to me (late 60's and 70's is the music of my youth) Twenty Feet was an amazing, heart-breaking, and ultimately inspirational story.  

In the "not really nominated for much" category, I did belly up to the cinematic bar for three "junk food" movies in the past few months. Catching Fire (the Hunger Games sequel) was pretty good but not much new as compared to the original. The Hobbit II / Desolation of Smaug - pretty much the same, with perhaps a tad more resentment for dragging what amounts to a thinnish book into three movies without a particularly meaningful of satisfying break point between the folms. And Thor: The Dark World was also pretty good (I especially like the way Marvel is bringing in young nerdish folks as foils / adjuncts for the heroes; I've kind of gotten hooked on Agents of Shield).

Now, what have I not seen?

Captain Phillips: No reason, really. Perhaps the Tom Hanks star vehicle (that Uncanny Valley thing, again), although I've heard a lot of NPR interviews that make me think I'd like it, and Tina Fey's "I am the captain, now" line from the Golden Globes (which, it turns out, was ad libbed by the Somali actor, per Tom Hanks) is bringing me around. I'll rent it between now and Oscar night, probably. 

Twelve Years a Slave: Again, no real reason.  Friends who saw it were kind of shocked by it, and being a lone wolf theater goer, mostly, (and being a bit down in life of late) perhaps I did not feel up to it. It's still in theaters so I really ought to try to get to see this one. I really enjoyed Lincoln (last year's "big, meaningful historical picture" that I did go see). On the other hand, I also seems to have missed "The Butler", so perhaps I'm a bit scared of pulling the scab off of my country's history of racism. 

Wolf of Wall Street: Just not a lot of interest. Leonardo Dicaprio has done nothing for me, in fact, looking over his CV, I seem to be actively avoiding films he's been in (Titanic, Gilbert Grape, and Catch Me If You Can are the sum of his films I've seen). Oh wait, I saw (and was pretty much unimpressed with) this year's Great Gatsby.  Similarly, Jonah Hill is another Jude-aversion actor (seeing only 2011's Moneyball). 

And finally, Philomena: Having spent my youth in the 60's and 70's catholic church (albeit south central Pennsylvania, not Ireland), I've got a kind of PTSD around a lot of the issues here. Themes of adoption, abortion, priests, nuns, folk mass, and catholic education swirled around my childhood. I love Judi Dench, so I'll probably see this. But might want to not see it alone....

One thing I try to do most years is get to Real Art Ways to see the Oscar Nominated films - they generally run the Oscar Nominated short films, short documentaries, and animated shorts in rotation and promise to this year from Feb 1 - 13. So I'll probably make it up to Hartford 2-3 times in the coming weeks.

And finally, all this cinema-passion is generally a preparation for the annual "Oscar Night Hartford" (a CARC / CT Aids Resource Coalition fund-raiser). CARC became AIDS Connecticut this year, and Oscar Night became Red Carpet Experience (probably for legal reasons). I've kind of pulled back from formal fund-raisers the past few years (not feeling particularly good about myself to dress up and be social) but Red Carpet Experience is in a good venue (Spotlight Theater) that offers some good hidey-holes for the anti-social (like, the theater, to watch the show) and the opportunity to put on a movie inspired costume. (Hm....I do recall a certain Minion costume) and besides, my friend and fellow yogini Wendy is the adult-in-charge of the event. So MAYBE.... 

Once more into the breech.....

In two days, I'll be knee deep into the first weekend of the 2014 yoga teacher training at West Hartford Yoga. This is the same training I attended in 2008 (I was, in fact, Teacher Trainee #1, signing up first for the first year of the training). I have been honored to have been part of this training since 2010 (when I stepped in four of the six weekends to hold space due to some personal issues with the other assistants). In 2011, I was invited back, and have been a part of the training ever since.

It has been a huge honor to be part of this, quite daunting and overwhelming, and something I look forward to both expectantly and with a bit of fear. I know I bring a lot to the training - a bit more Kapha energy than my teacher or the other assistant. Solid, reliable, consistent. I'm the teacher that the trainees can look to when they feel unworthy or inadequate, the real evidence that there many ways to practice, to teach. I'm the one seeking out the trainees trying to hide, to crawl into corners, to disappear.

But the training weekends are quite long and somewhat overwhelming - three long days, three hot and long practices (even though I'm assisting rather than teaching or practicing, it's quite draining). 

It's another big class. 49 this year (topping last year's 46), I think they set a max of 48 but for some reason one extra person snuck in (probably someone got overlooked or verbally committed but got left off the list until the last minute). I expect we'll lose one or two this first weekend (that seems to happen every year) and hopefully we'll be left with an even number.

We have two "repeat" trainees this year - not sure what their stories are yet. We tend to have a few each year; folks who feel they need another go at it, were not in a good place the first time around, or missed the deadlines for certification. But it will be nice to see them again. Other than that, the names are (mostly) unknowns. One Facebook friend, two or three names I recognize as regular students. I'm sure once we get them all together I'll recognize others from classes. But at least 40 who are at this point, unknowns.

We have a lot of guys this year - I count 11 names in the roster that are pretty solidly male gendered (and another 5-6 that could be, although I assume not). We've never had more than 4-5 men. So that will definitely change the character of the training, and give me a bit more to do - when it comes to assisting the larger guys, I tend to be a little more involved than Nykki and Barb. Barb will come assist me at times in class, not get me to budge at all, and then whisper "you did not feel that, did you?" Sometimes, height and weight provide a bit of advantage on top of skill and experience.

I spent a bit of time last night revising a document that I created last year to file the student photos. Last year, I took the initiative to take quick headshots on the first day and create a training class "facebook" (just photos and names) for the training staff to use, it helped us all a lot to get to know folks faster. I started with the 2013 document, so I got to look one last time at the 2013 class of trainees as a group. As I sit in the sharing circle tomorrow night, I am sure I'll have that odd feeling of familiarity (30+ sharing circles over the years) and newness (in my mind, the class of 2013 are "the teacher trainees", not this circle of strangers) . And it will be my great pleasure to get to know them over the next six months.

So yeah, teacher training 2014. I have no idea how I got here, but I'm happy that my life has turned in this direction. Bring it on.

Persistence

I've been getting phone calls for my brother. It's a foreign sounding gentleman (india? middle east?) and he asks specifically for my brother. I tell him there is nobody by that name here. He hangs up, and a few days later, same dude calls back. Bill Collector? Telemarketer?

What's really weird is that my brother has not lived with me since the mid 90's. And there is a whole raft of changes that have come between then and now, including:

* I have a new name
* I've moved twice
* I've changed phone numbers 4-5 times, moving from personal lines to business lines, and back
* For 7-8 years, I had no personal utilities (electric, gas, cable, phone, water) in my name (I moved in with a roommate)
* My brother never had utilities in his name at the old place.
* I do not get a lot of telemarketing calls (on do not call list) and I also do not get calls to other folks who share my last name. So it seems kind of targeted.
* I do get occasional bill collector / marketer calls for other folks who used to have my number.

Totally weird. All I can think of is that this guy has followed a string of "call forward" references from Waterbury to Newington to Hartford to Newington to New Britain.

Alternately, the guy I bought my condo from shares my brother's given name, and perhaps they are conflating that with my last name. Next time they call I am gonna see if I can find out what the heck they want....

Supporting Roles

January has traditionally been my time for catching up on films, especially the more mainstream Oscar contenders (as opposed to the indie / arts flicks I tend to catch at Real Art Ways). This week I caught two Saving Mr. Banks (Disney's very meta film about the making of Mary Poppins, with Emma Thompson and Tom Hanks) and Inside Llewyn Davis (The Coen Brothers Greenwich Village / folk music homage).

Before I did into the pics, a shout out to the supporting players. Specifically, Bradley Whitford (still indelibly marked and beloved in my memory for his role on The West Wing) and Ethan Phillips (a little less indelibly marked but none the less beloved as the heavily made-up alien Neelix from Star Trek: Voyager). It was really sweet (and only a tiny bit distracting) to see both of them on the big screen.

So first - Saving Mr. Banks. Like many of the films Tom Hanks has attached himself to over the years, the film felt a little too predictable, a little too designed to tug on the heart strings. But only a little - I still found myself deeply moved and appreciative of the 60s setting (kind of like Mad Men, West Coast edition), the integration of a beloved film of my childhood (which I have not seen in many years). Emma Thompson has been a bit of a personal crush for me, so it was hard to see her as crusty and cold. I appreciated the behind the scenes view of 60's film-making, and I thought the flashbacks to the Hoff family were quite effective.

Inside Llewyn Davis is a much more difficult film. I'm a folkie from way back, familiar with and have seen Dave Van Ronk* perform years back, have run into that sort of "dyed in the wool" authentic folk attitude, the musician too pissed off, too bent on being authentic or hitting every note exactly like the canonical recording of a piece to actually connect with an audience, etc. So it all felt very familiar in a cranky old folkie kind of way. There was a lot of dark humor in there (Llewyn trying to stash his box of LPs under a coffeetable and running into his hosts own box of LPs made me guffaw). I though Justin Timberlake's performance was great - well cast, subtly performed. And all of the performances (especially those of Oscar Isaac, as Llewyn) were spot-on.

There was some nostalgia here - days when a folkie would actually get signed by a label and have management (however inept or clueless). And also some things that never change ("I don't see a lot of money here....."). And the closing, with Llewyn curled up in an alley and a Dylan doppelganger on stage, was perfect.It was not the feel good movie that Saving Mr. Banks was, but it will stay with me.


So - both films get positive votes from me!

Ten Formative Albums

This one has been floating around Facebook, and I started doing it there, but decided it warranted a blog post!
RULES: In your status update, list ten albums that have stayed with you over the years in some way. Don’t take too long on this list - just a few minutes, tops. These don’t need to be “great” records or critical darlings. Just records that have meant something to you personally.

1. Neil Young - Live RustWhat's not to love, two sides of acoustic music I could play, two sides of guitar distortion I could play, and Neil Young's  vocals and harmonica playing seemed wholly within reach. Jimmy Fallon, I (along with a significant portion of my peer group with access to a guitar and a harmonic holder) did Neil Young impressions first

2. Lou Reed - Rock and Roll Animal I was a little old and a little uncool to get The Velvet Underground - but this album unlocked the whole NYC glam / punk / new wave scene for me.

3. The Who - Tommy I did a college thesis on this album, and to this date I can pretty much sing it through. I've never collected many Who albums, but this one I've always updated to the latest format.

4. On a Winter's Night (compilation) Not the more recent xmas / holiday release, this one is from North Star Records (1990). My intros to acoustic / singer songwriter music, and I discovered so many artists here that went on to become faves: John Gorka, Patty Larkin, Bill Morrissey, Julie Gold, Hugh Blumenfeld, Christine Lavin, David Wilcox, Cheryl Wheeler, David Mallett. There's a lifetime of music to listen to right there.

5. Bruce Springsteen - Born to Run I could pick any of a half dozen Springsteen albums (Darkness, The River, Wild, Innocent, Nebraska), but hey - Jungleland.

6. The Clash - London Calling Sandanista is a close second. If I've got the stereo blasting as I pull into the yoga studio, it's probably this album.

7. The Kinks - Kink KroniklesA little young and uncool to collect Kinks albums back in the day, but I wore out my vinyl copy of this one

8. The Cars - The Cars It's a little dated but it takes me right back to high school and it launched my rock music career. I still remember hearing that they mixed it on car stereo speakers so it would sound good in the car.

9. Dar Williams - The Honesty Room I was a Dar fan before THR came out - I actually own one of her pre-CD cassettes. So I've felt a little protective of her over the years and proud of her success. I bought my first copy of this from her at Roaring Brook Nature Center (where she was the featured performer for Open Mic night, not even a headliner) You never forget your first love. 

10. Peter Frampton - Frampton Comes Alive
Back in '77-'78 you either wore out Saturday Night Fever or you wore out this disk. This one was everywhere. If there were ubiquitous cell phones or digital cameras (or even videotape recorders) back in the day, one would be able to dig up footage of me faking the "do you feel like I do" vocoder bits, playing my Peavey T-60 through a wah-wah pedal at an end of school year lawn party. Any rock star aspirations I've entertained were born of this album. 

New Year / New Music

Well, not THAT new, really.

I braved the cold and slippery roads to make my way to New Haven last evening for the CT Folk / First Friday concert featuring No Fuss and Feathers Roadshow.



Who? - you might wonder.  Well, they are Karyn Oliver, Carolann Solebello, and The YaYas, familiar to this blogger from their visits to the Falcon Ridge Folk Fest. Karyn Oliver was an emerging artist performer in 2011,the Yayas were in the emerging artist showcase in 2012 and returned as "Most Wanted" artists in 2013. And Carolann Solebello is a repeat offender as a founding member of Red Molly, a group she stepped back from in 2010. Has it really been that long? The years they do pile up.... And although I generally get to know Falcon Ridg artists a bit through my work in the merch trailer, I rarely spend much time sitting in front of a stage at the fest, so catching up with Falcon Ridge performers in smaller venues is a nice side project.

Was a good sized crowd, surprising given the weather (bitter cold and the tail end of a pretty nasty storm that left the roads still somewhat snow covered and slippery) and the date (the first Friday after the new year), and a testament to both the loyal First Friday fan base and the quality and reach of these musicians.

This grouping (it's hard to call them a trio in the Cry Cry Cry / Red Horse / Red Molly / Brother Sun mold, since the Yayas brought a husband-wife duo to the ensemble) came together for the Joni Mitchell tribute album Blue (which I picked up last night), which in turn evolved from a women's folk collective called Chicks with Dip. Many of the musicians involved liked playing together so much that smaller sub-groups formed, including this one.

It was a wonderful musical evening. Not sure any one of the artists alone would have dragged me out, but the three in combination created a gravitational field plenty strong to pull me southward. Traditional guitars were supplemented with a bass (both Karyn and Carolann picked up what appeared to be a short scale bass, neither was funkmaster flash, although Carolann came close at one point, but both did fine). Jay from the Yayas brought a pea green Danelectro guitar at times which provided some tasty leads. Jay mostly played a Cajon beat-box, and Catherine played occasional shakers and miscellaneous percussion (and foisted same upon her bandmates unexpectedly). Mostly, each artist's solo efforts benefited through the increased heft of some backing instrumentation and wonderful harmonies - the three women's voices blended wonderfully, and the group was judicious in their use of instruments (sometimes these sorts of singer-songwriter cooperative efforts get a little "guitar army / 70s catholic folk mass" when everyone tried to play all the time) - but not the case here - they were well rehearsed and practiced as any full time band.

They played round-robin (somewhat like the Most Wanted or Friday Night song swaps at Falcon Ridge) which worked well, and augmented their originals with a mini-set from the Blue tribute as well as some interesting covers. I picked up Karyn's newest CD Magdalene, which includes a cover of one-hit-wonder Player's Baby Come Back which I sadly owned in my mis-spent youth (by dint of a K-Tel compilation album, no doubt) although I could not dredge the artist name out of my memory banks at Karyn's challenge to do so after she played it.

For a few years there I made it a habit to purchase the most recent Emerging Artist albums from eMusic (I'm a subscriber, and yeah, I know it's not the most artist-friendly way to purchase music, but I figure I get points for actually buying 16-20 albums from relatively unknowns each year). So I have Oliver's Red Dress and The Yaya's Everything albums - need to pick up their newest Paper Boats (was not sure if I owned it electronically, so did not buy it last night)  

So, great start to 2014, musically. See this trio quartet ensemble if you can!

2013 Recap

One of the benefits of being a cranky holiday curmudgeon with a social network insufficient to drag me out on New Year's Eve is that I have the internets to myself this New Year's Day. And although 7:00 am is far from early, it should be noted that's I've already made myself breakfast (the "almost never in the larder, but left over from xmas" bacon and blueberry pancakes) and done the dishes. So I'm up and at 'em.

Once upon a time I would scroll back through this blog to recap the past year. Alas, social media has cannibalized a lot of the minutia and epherma of the blogosphere - so I'll resort to Facebook to remind myself what the past year wrought.

Recurring Events

Falcon Ridge Folk Festival (for the 20th time, I think. Or 21st. I forget). Camp Camp (third year). Both commitment I'm planing to keep for 2014. As a single person who has done a lot of traveling over the years, without a ton of money, these are perfect times to get off the grid, step out of the ordinary, and immerse myself in loving and entertaining communities. Although "working vacations" (I spend most of the "fest" time at Falcon Ridge in the merch trailer, and teach 10 yoga classes at camp) are probably something I ought to take a long hard look at.

On the yoga front, still teaching yoga, 3x a week plus occasional subs and intro classes. Still assisting with the teacher training program at the studio (since mid-way through the 2010 training; this will be my 4th full year). The studio did Om Street: Yoga on Lasalle Road again, and I (again) ran the sound system. (again with the "working vacation" theme)

On the ballooning front, I actually dragged myself out to the Frozen Buns Rally (coming up again soon), the CLAS annual dinner / banquet (on a very snowy night in Southington), and the CLAS Safety Seminar. All three are on the calendar for 2014. I have (thankfully) stayed out of management with the CT Lighter Than Air Society (although they keep trying to drag me in)

New and Notable Events

We had a pretty awesome snowstorm last February that took several days to escape from. Power and cable stayed intact, so a few days of hunkering down and nesting. I went to Boston to see a Red Sox game for the first time in decades, with the Camp Camp crew. Got down to Pennsylvania for the Trees Family Reunion for the first time in years - Falcon Ridge Folk Fest has historically conflicted about 80% of the time, but with the new fest dates, I hope to be more of a regular.

I had two natural visitors this year - a mother robin nested under my back porch, laying four eggs and fledging her chicks. And a pretty cool spider spun an orb web at my front porch over several weeks this summer. Those, along with my perennial suet cake feeder friends, provided good feedback that I'm carving out nourishing and nurturing space in my life.

And I made two runs at cleaning up my life, food wise this year - a 21 day Detox Cleanse and a 7 day juice fast (with 6 am kundalini yoga, what the hell was I thinking?) - and although both were interesting and useful, neither seemed to be the key to unlock whatever physical, psychological, and emotional impediments I bear that keep me eating poorly.

Music, Playing

My beloved Guinea Pigs kept busy this year. We started the year at MCC on Main (for the first of two gigs), opened for 41 Prospect at the Hartford Road Cafe in Manchester, played Hartford Hodge Podge, Blue Back Square, numerous farmer's markets (Wethersfield, Higganum, Billings Forge, and Bozrah, where we played without AC power), the Audubon Nature Center, and the Glastonbury Apple Harvest Festival. We snuck in an open mike appearance at Lasalle Market in December to close out the year.

In addition, I made my Camp Camp musical debut playing bass for the Scat Orrs (don't ask, it's kinda gross), the infamous camp lesbian folk rock ensemble. I also backed up one of the solo artists on bass. Lot of fun! And although I barely have memory of this, apparently I played bass for several Grateful Dead songs at a UU service in Manchester.


Although it does not really count as playing per se, I ran the sound for kirtan at West Hartford Yoga (twice) and for Little Ugly at Blue Back Square.

And broadening the category to all performance art, I did a piece at the December edition of The Mouth - the theme was "I Fought the Law" and my piece was titled Burger Prank Foiled

Music, Listening

As usual, a diverse musical year. Dervish and Deborah Voight were two "tag along with friends because I'm the one who can drive at night" shows that were nevertheless delightful. The many artists of Falcon Ridge (of course). I snuck down to the CT Folk Fest this year (which has become a mini Falcon Ridge reunion) and saw several notables, among them Honor Finnegan and Poor Old Shine.

Also, Dar Williams at the Iron Horse (twice!) as well as Meg Hutchinson. The Iron Horse has become a nice place to meet up with friends from that part of the world (holla, Amy and Patty!). Little Ugly (total age-inappropriate music crush) many times, most notably a WNPR livecast from downtown Hartford. Kate Callahan twice (once at West Hartford Yoga, once at the nascent Hartfolk Fest). String Theorie (loved 'em!). Hugh Blumenfeld's new group, The Faithful Sky at Roaring Brook Nature Center.  FRFF Emerging Artists from years ago Danny Schmidt and Carrie Elkin. And Girlfriend Project, one of my friend Julie's many musical projects.

Home Improvement

So yeah, I was a busy beaver. My friend Nykki moved into a new condo, and watching her spiff up the new place motivated me to redo my upstairs bathroom. What started out as a "slap a coat of paint on the walls" became two steps shy of a total tear-down. I replaced all the lighting fixtures, all the electrical switches, the thermostat, the towel racks and sink fixtures, the faucet and drain, and, to ice the cake, the shower curtain, towels, and rug.

In addition, I replaced an old (and never used) ceiling fan / light fixture in my kitchen with pendant lamps (dimmable LED technology), replaced my kitchen sink fixture with undercabinet light bars (which force me to clean the sink area far more often), two outdoor light flxtures (front porch and back deck) with downward facing fixtures (to reduce light pollution).

I also fabricated some spiffy shade screens for my front porch (to both block afternoon sunlight and give me some privacy from the building next door)

In the sense that ART = HOME IMPROVEMENT, I picked up some nice pieces - a series of Guinea Pigs doing yoga poses (keywords META YOGA CUTE), a beautiful photo of a blue heron in flight, an original hand-drawn bird print. My home's walls have become a nice reflection of my soul....


Toys and Consumerism

The biggies this year were sound and audio gack. I picked up a 14 channel audio mixer, 16 channel snake, and a pile of audio gear (mics, stands, monitors, power cables) - building myself up a nice little sound system. Right now it (mostly) augments the studio's sound system for kirtans, but I aspire to do more.

I also picked up a cheap ukulele (I blame Camp Camp, and my friends Eden and Kaia) and a cheap Epiphone electric guitar (I blame fellow Guinea Pig and guitar hoarder Dan)

In the non-musical territory - a tripod sunscreen / shade for Falcon ridge (intended to provide rain and sun shade for my tent, not all that effective), a small windo A/C unit for the basement office (the summer got pretty insufferable around August) 

I finally gave up and purchased a flat-screen HDTV (totally a late-acquirer, the cost came down to the point it was cheaper than my CRT television was when I bought it in the early 90's) - and with that came the decision to "cut the cord" (with HDTV, the low cost analog cable I was buying seemed kind of stupid) - I bought a cheap antenna which I hooked up on the outside of a second floor window, and that, along with a Roku box and subscriptions to Netflix, Hulu Plus, and the free apps on my iPad, are all the television I really need).

And lastly, I retired my old canister vacuum cleaner (a Kenmore unit I'd been lugging around since the mid 80's, one of my first adult purchases with my Sears credit card), replacing it with a much lighter Dirt Devil unit. I also started to use the vacuum cleaner to clean kitchen and bathroom floors (heretofore I've been sweeping them, how dumb / luddite-ish am I?). And bought the first dustbuster I've owned in 20+ years. (I had taken to using a hand broom to brush the dog hair off the bed each morning, and came to the realization that this might be one contributor to the dog hair covered rug up there). So now I vacuum my bed most mornings. TMI, I know.

Transitions

I'd note all the new babies in my life, except THERE ARE TOO DAMN MANY OF THEM. But special welcome to Nate and Freya, who parents are particularly beloved. I will say that, although there are many young children in my world, without exception their parents are amazing, healthy, sane, and full of love and life, and the world will be a better place for each of these new life journeys.

I was fortunate to have no significant deaths in my life this past year, although friends did lose parents and loved ones. RIP especially to Lola the pug; her mama moved to Califormia this past year and although we did not spend a lot of time together, she was always a bit of a guardian angel to me.

This year I decided to stop playing with the studio's kirtan group - I was finding the events to be a huge sink of energy for me; I'd end up with a 2-3 day "hangover" from each kirtan, and be filled with resentment at those who I saw as taking from me, but not sustaining me. The group has survived (with a new bass player and guitarist, apparently it takes two people to fill my seat, although both are far better musicians, and their involvement has affirmed my decision) and I've taken on a new role a sound engineer which lets me be part of it (OK, I'm still there for hours of set-up and tear-down) without draining my energy. I'm very happy with that decision. 

This year I also seem to have made a decision to stop traveling for work. It was less than conscious - it was in fact very awkward. I took a trip out to Portland, OR - and never finished the trip report, never billed the customer. I've just grown tired of that aspect of my work - I'm busy enough with the things I can do remotely, it disrupts my financial, teaching life, and travel has become such an unpleasant chore. Getting older? World changing? Life changing? Not really sure.

Finally, my yoga practice has transitioned this year into something different. I've been (over the years) a "Type A" yogi - hitting the mat 5+ times a week for a vigorous power practice. Whether it's age, the physical cost of being overweight and eating poorly, wear-and-tear from the practice, or some combination, I know I am good for maybe 2 power practices a week with a very select set of teachers. Add an angsty relationship with the community itself (and my own difficulties balancing my expectations and roles as teacher, student, friend, community member) and lack of resonance with some of the available less vigorous classes, and I'm just not spending a lot of time on the mat there.

Friends and Relationships

It's been a tough year on that front - a lot of holidays and weekends spent by myself, digging in to a cave of loneliness and self-pity. Yet there have been some highlights.

My friend Cheryl, the dark spirit of my teacher training class who terrified me (and was therefore someone I was curious about) has become such a good friend. Although we are on such different wavelengths (she runs somewhere between 4x and 10x as fast as I in just about everything - jobs, passions, living arrangements, relationships - so it's hard to keep up with her) she is nevertheless the one person who I can count on for a "how you doing?" text or an out of the blue invite for pancakes or pho. 

My friend Amy, who has transitioned from being on the periphery of my life (we've been Dar List / Dar Camp and Falcon Ridge acquaintances for many years, although truthfully she was mostly memorable for her hat and her camera for a lot of years) to being a good friend through Camp Camp and Falcon Ridge. She's helped to bridge the lonely weekends with Facebook chat and the occasional folk music foray (yeah, Iron Horse!) - and I can only admire her stamina when it comes to getting out to see live music!

And my "Little Buddy", Kaia (which she has noted, makes me "The Skipper") . I've no kids, but if I did, and could pick, she'd be atop the list - smart, talented, beautiful, real. It's been such a pleasure (and honor) to watch her life journey unfolding and she's one of those "I knew her back before she was famous" people.

Finally, my friend and teacher Barbara, who puts up with all my bullshit and flailing around (and 2013 was a big year for both) and neverthless continues to hold a place for me in the yoga teaching ranks, honors me with the opportunity to assist teacher training, makes sure I have at least one healthy meal per month, and drags my sorry ass up and down the hills of Colchester periodically, occasionally in a downpour. 

And although my single status and lack of a life partner seems to be a recurring source of struggle for me, well, there are signs of life. Faint maybe, but they are there.

In Summary

So...much as I whine and kvetch about how sucky / empty / lonely my life is - don't let that fool you. I had a pretty full and awesome year. If 2014 brings more of the same, who am I to complain?

I'm going to publish this now (while the day is young) and then go back and hyperlink the hell out of it. Because that's how I roll.

Old Friends

Friday night, I snuck up to Northampton to see Dar Williams and Lucy Wainwright Roche at the Iron Horse. I was not really planning to head up (my usual Modus Operandi) but a Facebook friend who happens to run merch for Dar posted a "Who am I going to see at the concert?" post and that prodded me out of my pre-weekend lethargy, and off I went. As I listened to Dar, I realized that this is the fourth time I've seen her play in the past year - last year's Middnight on Main in Middletown, the Iron Horse (right around this time, I forget exactly when), Falcon Ridge, and now this show.

Dar and I go way back. I ran across her back in '92, before The Honesty Room was released in fact, as she was tooling around New England with her guitar and a box of cassette tapes. Yes, I do own a copy of "All My Heroes are Dead" on cassette....

My first encounter was somewhat problematic. A friend (oh, OK, to be honest, my ex) was coming back east from Los Angeles, and was looking for a place to play, I approached graham, the owner of a slimy bar in Bristol called The Common Ground that ran a Sunday evening folk series and a Monday evening open mic. Graham, seeing the dollar signs of a homecoming concert, said sure and offered a date. What I did not know was that he had already booked that date to a musician named Dar Williams, who got bumped to opener.

My ex did well that night - filled the bar up with her family and friends. Graham did well, with a full bar on a Sunday night. And I'd like to think Dar did well - playing a short set to a full room (instead of the handful of folks she'd draw on other occasions at the bar), selling some merch, and picking up one very devoted fan (me).

I became a Dar Williams fan that night. That led me to see her at the Common Ground on other occasions (often to a smallish crowd that made me feel bad if I needed to leave at the break) and other New England coffeehouse venues. I particularly remember one gig at a little coffeehouse in East Hampton where she broke a guitar string and had no spares - thankfully another musician, John Scott, had a guitar in his car and lent it to Dar. For many years (until recently, in fact) Dar seemed to be quite a nervous guitar player on stage, I'd sit on the edge of my seat praying for a successful first few songs until she settled in. She was always the kid sister I was rooting for to do well.

I was there at Roaring Brook Nature Center for an Open Mic where Dar debuted "The Honesty Room" - she was the "featured performer"  (not quite a headliner) and she signed my copy "Thanks for listening....and for playing". Ironically, one of the songs I did that night was the Roches "Face Down at Folk City" (also, John Gorka's "The Gypsy Life")

And yes, I was at the WWUH Holiday benefit for which Dar wrote "Christians and the Pagans", the Nields wrote "Merry Christmas, Mr Jones" and my local faves High Blumenfeld and Margo Hennebach performed. 

I was active on the "Dar List" email list, visited (but did not camp with) the Dar Camp group at Falcon Ridge, was there for the first time the Falcon Ridge hillside lit up for "Iowa" (not cell phones, back in the day, but real lighters and flashlights)

Over the years, as Dar has grown into a mature and successful artist, I kind of stepped back. I still loved her music and bought it all, but she was playing larger and more expensive venues, and I kind of felt like she no longer needed me in the audience. So it's been lovely to reconnect with her and her music.

Now, Lucy Wainwright Roche. She was a Falcon Ridge Emerging Artist back in 2008 and returned as a Most Wanted artist in 2009. (to be honest, I was shocked it was that long ago). But I've been a fan of music by women named Roche (Suzzy is Lucy's mom) for 30+ years. It was 1980 or thereabouts when I stumbled across a review of The Roches first trio album in Rolling Stone - my musical tastes at the time ran along the Springsteen / Neil Young / Cars axis (although I was dabbling in Lou Reed and Jonathon Richman), so these three funky, folkie, NYC folk-punk women was a real change of pace. I was smitten by their cover photo, their harmonics, their humor. Been a huge fan ever since.

I've seen the Roches live a handful of time (most notably, front row center at the Tarrytown Town Hall). In the "music collection" department, in terms of how much of an artist's catalog I own, I'd have to rank Dar #1, Springsteen #2, and The Roches #2. So yeah, big Roches fan. And in the ensuing years, I've also picked up a fondness for Loudon Wainwright, Lucy's father. So yeah, Lucy is worth a trip, anytime!

Lucy and Dar were both in good voice and good humor. I particularly loved Lucy (having only caught her in short sets at Falcon Ridge in the past) and her "not quite as seasoned a perfomer as Dar" was charming and authentic. Dar's set and performace was not much different from last time I saw her at Iron Horse - she's such a mature and polished performer these days that it's hard to be quite so thrilled and smitten as when she was a bit more of a wild card. But still, wonderful to see her and hear her.

Local New Britain

Dug in a little deeper to New Britain CT (my home town) this weekend.

1) Visited the New Britain Museum of American Art  (or NBMAA) - primarily to see the Maurice Sendak exhibit, but also to become a member. I live in this fair city, might as well support some of the local arts organizations. There was also an opening (Hawaiian art) and a Kwanzaa celebration - so plenty of music and food. The Sendak exhibit was lovely - and when I think of him I recall his last Fresh Air interview with Terry Gross and cry a little.

2) Dropped by the New Britain YMCA to hand in my Groupon (6 months membershio for $99) - I was a member a while back and enjoyed the pool 1-2 times a week, hoping to get back on that particular horse starting this week. I love swimming; it seems to be good for my shoulders, and then I can get a nice soak in the jacuzzi. And might even find my way back onto the racquetball court or some of the cardio machines.

3) Packed up two cases of empty bottles to return to Avery's Beverages (still in the car though, they are not open Sunday or Monday) - the bottles have been hanging around since summer, waiting for me to finish up the last strays. I'll probably pick up a case of adult mixer soda's (their Orange Dry is particularly good, as is the Lime soda) in case I feel like a little holiday cocktail. I do not drink a lot of soda, so do not mind spending a bit more for local and unusual flavors.

Other New Britain hotspots and organizations I need to explore a bit more: Trinity-on-Main (a local church transformed into an arts space), Hole-in-the-Wall Theater, and the Greater New Britain Arts Alliance.

Francis Dunnery House Concert

Not what I expected. Not what I expected at all.

My friend Andrea (and her husband Charlie) hosted a social weekend - a blow out holiday party last night (mostly her neighbors and co-workers, a handful of friends from the yoga world, and the local indie fave Little Ugly, who reportedly got shut down early by the WH cops....). Today, she had invited me over for a house concert with a "singer-songwriter and story-teller", by the name of Francis Dunnery.

Now, having been a folkie (fan, musician, festival crew) for nearly 25 years, I figured I was in for some old chestnuts, some New England story-telling, something a little rustic, a little crunchy, a little earnest. You know - the meat and potatoes of every open mic and coffeehouse from Maine to Philly. I've listened politely to scores of such performers over the years, and I'm always happy to pick out a gem of a song from an evening, or rarer, discover an artist that I'd want to listen to again.

Well, I figured wrong. Francis Dunnery is not that kind of musician. Rather, he is a spiritual seeker and wise man who spent a few years fronting the art-prog-blues-fusion band It Bites, before hitting the wall of hedonistic rock n' roll lifestyle, and changing his life.

His Wikipedia page is seeded with words that resonate - addiction, recovery (not that unusual, given the music business), but then horse whisperer, carpentry, astrology, Jungian psychology. Francis Dunnery has done a hell of a lot of work.And it shows. His house concert this evening is accurately described by him (as quoted by Wikipedia) as: 

"(showing up) as a friend — you can't show up as a rock dude or something — and it’s just me and my acoustic guitar, no amplification, singing my songs and holding a 90-minute lecture on the human condition. I sing songs and tell stories of my life. It’s not a party; it’s more like going to church, but church with swearing!... (There is) an exchange of energy that I call a 'jacuzzi'. At the end of 90 minutes, everybody has dropped their ego. They don't even realise that has happened, but they have gradually taken off their clothes and gone into that energetic jacuzzi together. Something like that is a lot harder to achieve in a rock music arena."

And yeah, it was all that and more. By the end of the evening, we were talking deep yoga concepts - letting go of ego, being in the present moment. It was as if someone stepped out of an enlightenment intensive and happened to pick up a guitar on the way home. Here's a sample of today:



So impressed, I picked up three disks (which he barely seemed to want to take money for) - 2001's "Man", 2013's "Frankenstein Monster" and a 2008 DVD (recorded in 2001 or thereabouts) called "In the Garden of Mystic Lovers" I'm looking forward to spending some time listening and watching.....

Did I expect to get my spirit buzzed up this evening? No, I did not - I was probably going to spend the evening on the couch or cleaning bathrooms, but for Andrea's text this afternoon. But I did go. And it was pretty inspiring, pretty enlightening, pretty wonderful. 

Burger Prank Foiled

 The preliminary version (pretty much as told, with some things I forgot) at last night's edition of "The Mouth" at the Mark Twain House.  Thanks to Chion Wolf and Jacques Lamarre for hosting. The theme of last night's story-telling was "I Fought the Law: Encounters with law Enforcement".

An ironic twist - as I sat down, the story-teller sitting next to me, leaned over and whispered "That would not happen to be Marian High School, would it?" - turns out he grew up in Framingham and graduated from North High School in 1978. Small world!

In February of 1979, the band A Taste of Honey won the Best New artist Grammy Award on the strength of their hit “Boogie Oogie Oogie”.

In March of that year, the Three Mile Island nuclear plant melted down. In April, my father passed away after many years of struggling with cardio-vascular disease.

In June, I graduated from high school, and in August of that year – I was arrested.

But it all started with the Grammy Awards. “A Taste of Honey” had won the Best New Artist award that year, grabbing it away from our beloved favorites “The Cars”.   My friend Jim, the bass player of our high school basement rock band, with aspirations of making radical art, concocted a bit of social and cultural protest for this offense. We’d spray paint a Rolling Stones tongue, along with the tag “CARS REVENGE” on the billboard of radio station KISS 108, the local disco station whose advertising featured a pair of lips. The billboard he had identified was up three stories, on a factory alongside, and clearly visible from, the Massachusetts Turnpike.

So one night, a hand-picked group of friends drove in to Boston. We were able to get into the factory parking lot easily enough, and the building was designed in such a way that the three stories could be climbed one floor at a time. We each had been assigned our jobs – Jim did the painting, football lineman Kevin hoisted Jim on his shoulders, Mike (with his 70’s era Dodge Charger that you could sit five across) drove, one of the local track stars climbed the building and threw down a rope for the others. I think my job was to be nervous about it all and keep an eye out for the cops.

A lot could have gone wrong (not the least of which was Jim or Kevin falling off the sign) but nothing did – and we succeeded that night in our mission. No cops.

That evening gave birth to “The Maneuvers” – our code word for going out at night with an eye to making some sort of mild vandalism or mischief. I don’t remember all of the things we did that year – some were I am sure directed at or designed to impress classmates or fast food coworkers - although I do remember breaking into the Framingham State College gymnasium, and stealing a large plywood hand painted sign that said “The Pit” - the nickname for their student section – in order to place it atop the covered patio of the smoking area of my catholic high school, known somewhat less officially as “The Pit”. 

Now, that summer, we had graduated from high school and were heading out for college, and decided to enjoy one more evening of mischief. The goal that night was street signs – so we set out in Jim’s family ranch wagon, a cooler full of beer in the “hole” in the way back. We grabbed a lot of signs that night – we got our names, the names of friends. We had it down to a science – a rubber mallet, one of us climbed up on another’s back and gave the sign a couple of whacks – and it was off. We stowed the signs in the “way back” hole, and continued on.

Jim had a bigger catch in mind that night – we were going to grab a “Now Entering Framingham” sign. And we did indeed – this time with the aid of a ratchet set (there were a lot of mounting bolts) and a bit more time. We put that in the back of the wagon and set off back for Jim’s house. En route, we passed an “A frame” sign outside of a local burger joint, and one of us (possibly me, although it might have been any of us) suggested we swipe that sign and put it in front of the local McDonald’s, where a couple of us worked that year.

So after dropping the big sign off (but still with the street signs and beer in the hole), we headed back for the burger sign. Should be a piece of cake, park, swipe, drive away.

Unbeknownst to us, the Framingham Police were staking out the bank nearby. And, as one of the cops later reported, they noticed us and said “what the BLEEP are those kids up to?” Within seconds, we were busted.

Now, we were all “good kids” from the local catholic high school, and we were scared to death – we answered the cops questions, we were polite and suitably cowed. Well, except for Jim, who started to get mouthy with the cops. When the cops asked for help pulling the sign out of the car, Jim resisted “get it out yourself”, but I hissed “get over there” thinking about the storage hole full of purloined street signs, and the cooler full of beer, that I did *not* want the cops finding. As I remember it, the cooler was an inch taller than the storage home, and the door did not close fully. Even though I was not driving and it was not my car, I was also the only 18 year old (the legal drinking age back then) in a car full of 17 year olds, and all I could think of was 5 counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor charge.

But, the cops never checked the car, we put the sign back, and they let us park Jim’s car in the restaurant lot while they took us to the station.

Here’s what I remember from the arrest:

1.  I was wearing a red I SURVIVED THREE MILE ISLAND tee shirt. The nuclear accident had happened that March; my father had died that April. So when my family went down to Lancaster PA to bury Dad, I somehow managed to pick up a tee shirt. Somewhere in the bowels of the Framingham PD is a booking photo of me with this dumb shirt.
2. The cop taking my fingerprints was making small talk, and when he found out I was going to Worcester Polytechnic Institute that fall, was all excited because his brother went there, and I really ought to look him up if I need anything. Um, how about if you just let me go right now?
3. Jim seemed to enjoy the experience, swinging on the bars in his cell, and castigating the cops for taking his shoelaces and belt “I’m gonna hang myself over a sign? Come on!?”

Amazingly, we did not have to call out parents - we called a friend who had gotten paid that day and had enough cash to bail us out; we had to go to court the next day. I remember standing at my mom’s bedside that next morning “Mom….I need to talk to you about something”. Here she is, a widow less than four months, and already her kids are starting the long slide towards juvenile delinquency, starting with her oldest.

And to our great fortune, one of our party that night (who I’ll call J. Worthington Smythe III, not his real name which was a hell of a lot more ostentatious) was destined for Holy Cross, ROTC, law school, the bar and with any luck a career in politics, and had a father who had taken the same route. An arrest record on J. Worthington’s permanent file would NOT do – so J. Worthington II got the charges dropped to a misdemeanor, gtot the case nolo’d and had the records sealed – we had to pay a fine but no conviction record. Although to be honest, I’ve told some version of the story in job interviews. It’s the sort of “show me you have character” story that works in the engineering field.

  

And that weekend, in small, page 16 news tidbit about 2 column inches long, we made the paper: BURGER PRANK FOILED, with all of our names (and our college destinations!)  Jim cut it out, and taped it up in his bedroom. I would not be surprised if he still has it…

Makers Monday - Buying Local Art

One of my local holiday traditions has been to shop local artists and craftspersons. I've been a bit more active this year, with visits to several Hartford spaces (Artspace and The Dirt Salon) during Open Studio, the Holiday Artisan Marketplace (via the Connecticut State of Makers) at Waterbury City Hall, and a more regular visit to Wesleyan Potters. 

At Artspace, I picked up a couple of holiday gifts (which I will not share here), along with a delightful bowl made by Colleen Colabella from Towers of Hope & Pottery Creations, from East Granby. Most of her work involves small towers - but I sussed out this bowl - loved the raised pattern on the outside - organic, kind of china-like, and signaling a lightness or translucence.

Not on the web that I can find, but she's worth finding at local shows and fairs.

At the State of Makers Holiday Artisan Marketplace, I found some yummy jams, concocted by Omnomnom Jams and Jellies - I've been enjoying their Monkey Mayhem (banana, pineapple, cocoanut, I think) on my morning  and also picked up a jar of Pretty Peach. They are just getting started (and could use nice labels on their jars!) but a fun and affordable treat!

Also at the Waterbury event, I found some nice earrings, created by Kate Stephen Jewelry - I'm always looking for something fun and funky and these resonated - being an electrical engineer, it's fun to find something copper.

And, I bought a lovely and funky decorated shirt for a fashionable friend. 

Finally, at Wesleyan Potters, I found a few lovely pieces. I'm a big fan of the birds of late, especially once I realized they are the modern dinosaurs, and the Great Blue Heron is perhaps one of the best reminders of that. Walking my dog at a local farm, a heron swooped overhead (a mere 10'-20' high) and I felt that primitive, mammalian fear that was perhaps implanted in my DNA eons ago when my tiny ancestors were prey for flying pterodactyls. So this photo, by Tom Flynn, of a heron in flight, was perfect.

 

My friend Amy is a stained glass artist (you can view her work and shop at Singing Whale Stained Glass)  - so I am always looking at stained glass. I found this fused glass fish (not sure of artist) - I liked the rainbow / chakra colors, I'm a Pisces, and one of the images or concepts of the divine that have come to me through Enlightenment Intensive work over the years was  of a fish. So yeah, great for my yoga space.

Finally, this vase (artist unknown) spoke to me - it's solid and somewhat primative with it's figuring that feels reminiscent of hieroglyphs or cunieform. No idea why I like what I like, but I liked this enough to purchase it. 

Thankful

I'll admit it, I've been in a bit of a funk this year.

There's a lot in there - loneliness that make weekends and holidays difficult, injuries that have kept me out of the hot and power yoga practices that have kept me going the past many years, an awareness of time moving past, less than healthy eating, and all of it wrapped around a core of struggle that has made me a bit of a curmudgeon, a bit of a misanthrope.

And yet, there is much to be grateful for.

I'm grateful for my home - so many of my friends struggle to find housing, have roommates that are not always nurturing, or are unrooted. I bought my condo four years ago and it's become a little nest - space to work, space to practice, space for my dog, space to relax and unwind. It's not always rarely clean throughout, but I keep at least 1-2 spaces presentable.

I'm grateful for Elo, my little dog. When I moved into this place I was not expecting to bring him with me - thinking he'd not do well alone, in a condo, without a back yard to run in. But he's done well - not too barky, not too neurotic, and a good excuse to get me out for a long walk every day. So often when I've felt down and alone, his warm body and brown eyes keep me going.

I'm grateful for my band. Who would have guessed that 30+ years from high school and college, when music was such a big part of my life, that I'd still have the opportunity to pick up a guitar, pick up a bass, and make some music. We play and rehearse enough to keep the music tight and enjoyable, but not so much as to overwhelm and burn out.

I'm grateful for my teacher, and my practice. While yoga has become a place of struggle for me over the past year, and is no longer my daily addiction. I continue to be grateful for the opportunity to practice, and the opportunity to teach. And I am grateful for a community that is tolerant of my recent thrashing around and lashing out, and does not seem interested in letting me disappear.

I am grateful for my work and my clients - it has been 15 years since I unfurled my business banner and launched my engineering practice. I am admittedly spoiled for a regular 40 hour a week, 9-5 job now, but I am grateful for enough work to pay my bills and live my life, yet gives me plenty of space for yoga, for music, for folk fests and weeks at camp.

I am grateful for my friends. I am not particularly gregarious - and struggle to find people and communities in which I feel at home. So my friends who have been there and hung on, who have space in their lives for an occasional call, a text message, or a Facebook message, are precious to me. 

I am grateful for folk music, and the Falcon Ridge Folk Fest. Who could have predicted that when I rolled into the fest back in '98 (or was it '97?), parked my little Mazda along the creek line at Long Hill Farm, that I'd be meeting people and joining a community that would be with me for 25+ years.

Along those lines, I am grateful for social media. As much as Falcon Ridge has been a regular part of my life, it took Facebook to turn that precious week in July into a 52 week a year community. I'm a bit of a Facebook crank (not really accepting friend requests from folks I have not met in person) and yet I've ended up with 550+ friends, reaching across the country. Part of that is diversity (yoga, Falcon Ridge, Camp Camp, music, history) yet the connection (however tenuous or virtual) to a circle of others is precious.

I am grateful for my family. So many folks who have taken my journey have lost family. While I miss having a huge extended family nearby, and my nuclear family is somewhat distant, they are always there for me. I'm heading up for a visit later this morning.

I'm sure I am forgetting many things - communities, people, opportunities, comforts. But even so, there is much to be thankful for this Thanksgiving Day.

New Food Rules

Following my juice cleanse, I've decided to establish some new food rules to encourage myself to eat better. These are almost entirely behavior related and have very little to do with nutrition, calories, etc. I know how to eat well; I just rarely do - choosing expedience, convenience, etc. So from here on:

* I will eat two meals at home each day. Maximum of one meal eaten outside the home.

* I will eat two meals with no animal protein each day. I can choose animal protein (including dairy and eggs) at one meal each day. 

* I will limit myself to one (1) fast food meal per week (McDs, BK, Wendy's, Arby's, as well as local burger joints). Basically, anything that includes French fries and comes in a bag counts as "fast food"
* Maximum of one carbonated beverage (i.e. - soda, sugar or diet) per week. 

* No meals through the drive-thru. If I want fast food, I need to go in and get it.

* No meals eaten in the car.  I will eat in the restaurant or bring it home. 

* No donuts. A particular weakness of mine. If I need a bakery nosh, it will be a bagel.

Let's see how this works. So far so good. 

Seven Day Chakra Karma Cleanse

Today, Sunday, marks the final day of a seven day cleanse for me.

Since Monday, I've been hitting a 6 am (eep!) Kundalini yoga class led by Marcia Vallier. And my only nourishment has been a selection of juices, broths, and elixers supplied by Karma Cleanse in Bloomfield.  It's been an interesting week, with a lot of self (re)discovery / realization. Some initial thoughts.

Juice Cleanse

This was a good program for me - I'm not good at food prep and managing / preparing this sort of thing. So I'd be more than likely to step back from the cleanse for lack of an ingredient, or a tool (like a juicer), or a simply laziness / fatigue. But  Alicia at Karma Cleanse brought us a "six-pack" of bottles each day (supplemented by fresh solid food today) - typically three juices, two "healing broths" and an herbal tea. So there was nothing to prepare - just open the freshly juiced / brewed concoction and consume, clean the bottle, and return the next day. Just my speed.

The juices were aligned to the seven chakra's (each day's practice focused on a particular chakra) - so on Day #1 we had a red beet based juice, Day #2 was a carrot based, Day #3 was a delicious pineapple (with cayenne for kick!), Day #4 was green (apple?), Day #5 was blueberry based. It seemed a little forced to me (choosing a product based on "chakra color" rather than cleansing properties) although I was willing to suspend disbelief for the duration. Regardless of the sequence, the variety was most welcome and all of the juices were pleasant, flavorful, and nourishing.  In addition, each mid-day juice was a mixed greens juice (little less sweet, very nourishing).

The healing broth was delicious and warming, and the last few days has included a small amount of quinoa, a welcome addition. And the teas varied - lemongrass, ginger, etc. and were tasty either cold or warm. I'm not sure I can afford (nor logistically manage) a regular integration of the Karma Cleanse products into my diet, but I'd certainly pick up a few days worth for an occasional short cleanse. A very high quality product, well packaged and marketed, and quite tasty and refreshing.

Kundalini Yoga

I've said it before, and I will say it again - Kundalini Yoga drives me crazy. It would not be my first choice for a cleanse or series. Mostly, I feel as if I move into my body / spine with quick, jerky motions long before I am really warm and even when warm it feels a bit rough / risky. In addition, the various arm positions crank right into shoulder injuries and limitations. So I spent the week working through and around a lot of stuff related to the practice, but really I had no problems with it.

What I *do* like about Kundalini is the internal / spiritual practice (lot of time to pause and go inward), the chanting / singing, the energetic aspects. And I adore Marcia as a teacher and a person - with my recent shoulder limitations and various other ailments / struggle, I've stayed away from her power classes, so it was a treat to work with her for a week straight. And as much as I growled about 6 am yoga (usually via humorously cranky Facebook updates), I am in truth a morning person and driving home at 7:15 am with the day in front of me was a good feeling.

Personal Observations

I was surprisingly not all that miserable throughout the cleanse. Monday was a tough day - low grade headache, fatigue, crankiness. I got through the morning yoga and my 9 am class, and then spent a lot of the day vegging out and watching Netflix (Ken Burns' Civil War, for the second time, for those interested).

The rest of the week I was surprisingly not suffering serious detox symptoms. I was low energy most of the week (I compared it to going into hibernation) and fortunately work was kind of slow - so I picked off the things that came in, took a few meetings, but did not push ahead any big projects. Worked for me. I think that I was not all that "detoxy" because the juice based cleanse was high enough in sugars (fruit based) and while my past habits have been pretty horrible in terms of gluten, dairy, fast / fried food, sugar-free sodas, giving my body a regular dose of higher quality sugars made me happy enough. That suspicion was supported by my hamstrings (which got pretty tight during the cleanse week, although they have eased off a bit). The past few days I've been a little light-headed, not really dizzy, just a little floating.

I totally blew off regular yoga this week - spending some time on the mat prior to teaching but not doing any formal classes - because I felt like I needed the break, and that feels like the right decision. Going to hit a class this afternoon, although not a hot / power class quite yet.

So what does it all mean to me? When it comes to healthy eating / food / nutrition, I've been through everything, often twice: mindful based eating, detox cleanse, a week at Kripalu doing a healthy eating workshop, a juice cleanse (with betamite clay for colon clearing), Weight Watchers. (and in the case of the whole foods heavy WHY Teacher Training, 4 times, once as a trainee, thrice as an assistant) - so it's not about information - it's mostly will and getting past psychological and emotional blocks. Mostly, I'm planning to use this week as a line of demarcation - trying to lose bad habits (pre-cleanse) and develop some good habits (post-cleanse) - the cleanse gives me a little bit of space and perspective that a "starting Monday morning I'm going to change" approach, or a "small incremental changes" approach have so far failed to provide.

One thing that became clear, this week as well as in a previous detox cleanse, was how much I use my meals as the tent pole "structure" and reward of my daily life. Being self employed and tending towards a bit of introversion, I could go entire days with zero human contact other than when I am teaching or visiting the studio to practice. So the simple interaction of a restaurant worker or check-out person becomes a kind of precious daily contact for me. I need desperately to put in place some other mechanisms for human contact that do not involve purchasing (usually unhealthy) food.

My plan going forward: I'm going to ease back into real food - picking up some organic broths and soups and continuing that for at least one daily meal. While I do not feel particularly sensitive to things like dairy, gluten, etc. I'm planning to switch to a rice based mild substitute for the small bits of dairy I use, and to work with healthy grains (brown rice, millet, quinoa) as a meal base. I'm not going vegetarian, but I do plan to cut back on animal protein, and use more beans. And of course, working with more fresh veggies (green and otherwise) and fruits. I'll still eat crap on occasion but the emphasis here is "on occasion" - 1-2 meals a week, either socially or when my schedule keeps me away from home at meal times.

In summary: a really positive experience - totally manageable, realistic, and enriching. While my sundry and myriad aches, pains, injuries and limitations remain active, I do feel lighter, brighter, and more positive. With 2014 teacher training coming up in two short months, I'm motivated to eat healthier, strengthen my asana practice, and get healthier. Let's see where things go from here....

Faithful Sky at Roaring Brook Nature Center

Yes, I am a big folk / acoustic music fan. And no, I do not get out to see live music enough. But I did venture out last  evening, to see The Faithful Sky at the Roaring Brook Nature Center. 

The Faithful Sky is the new collaboration, built around Hugh Blumenfeld, with longtime collaborators Jim Mercik and Diane Chodkowski, and relative newcomers Jeff Buchbinder and Mark Hall. While I seem to catch up with Hugh semi-regularly, it was delightful to see him for a full show, in such a great space, and with a full band backing him up.

I sat in the back and happily mouthed the words to many of Hugh's old songs - Diane and Jim both took leads for a pair of songs (Diane's cover of Shindell's Fleur de Lis was lovely, Jim's song Is This Enough was driving and wonderful).  A few covers came along - Hugh's rendition of This Land is Your Land sequed into Which Side Are You On, with what seemed like a lyrical makeover. Hugh brought out a cover of Eliza Gilkyson's to-be-released song All Right Here that was romantic and sweet. There were plenty of sing-along opportunities. And the closer, Cohen's Hallelujah, which Hugh was playing before Rufus Wainwright, Shrek, and Jeff Buckley, was so reverent and powerful.

It was so sweet to be in that wonderful acoustic and energetic space, to hear that wonderful music. Roaring Brook tends to bring in more of the old time, road weary folkies as well as acoustic guitar heroes - not always my first choice in live music. (Stan the organizer appeared not to have seen a Cajon before....which is kind of indicative of the little time warp of folk music that Roaring Brook has become) But this was a great opportunity to hear and old friends.