June 30, 2006

Ugh Tired

The Connecticut Sun lost, in an uglier game than Tuesday's win, to Detroit. Detroit was sharp - aggressive, quick, shot well. Despite a bunch of T's (Bill Laimbeer, plus two players), the Shock got under the Sun's skin. I kind of like the Shock - Ruth Riley plays hard and has talent (sort of like Rebecca Lobo, although maybe with a little more shadow self) and Katie Smith is just a grinder. Plus the Shock showed a lot of speed - down the lane, coming up court, on defense. Yowza. That's two losses at home to Detroit.

Heading to bed now - if the weather holds, I may be balloon chasing (or perhaps, riding) tomorrow morning. First time all year; between the weather, BB's jobs, and life busyness, I have not been near a hot air balloon all season.

Tell President Bush: Keep Girls Part of the Team

As a fan of women's sport, and a person who came to regular physical activity later in life, I kind of wish there had been more options besides the conventional team sports (baseball, football, basketball, and boys only) when I was growing up.

Recently, the Bush Administration made a major change to Title IX policy that threatens to reverse the enormous progress women and girls have made in sports. There's a great Flash movie to inspire you to join me, soccer star Julie Foudy, and others across the country in signing this petition!

Check out the Flash movie here

Watching the film and signing the petition takes just a minute or two of your time. I hope you'll join me in signing on!


Kate Callahan - WNPR @ 9:00 a.m.

I was leaning off the mat this morning; too much work to finish up by the end of the month (uhm, that's today), and taking off early this afternoon to get down to the game.

But, life provides a fix, Kate Callahan is on WNPR (90.5) at 9:00 a.m. - for an in-studio concert on John Dankosky's Where We Live show. WWUH (91.3) (Mixed Grille with Steve Theaker). Aural yoga, while I work.

June 29, 2006

Work Has Been Busy

It's just been whacked. I have two WNBA games this week, a site visit to Waterbury, and a slew of reports. A website client has dumped a pile of updates on me over the past few weeks (all taken care of), and there is an email newsletter to send to 10,000 of my closest friends, and a few other little projects. Things have been buzzing along.

Tomorrow, I'll sit and do reports for a while, and I bet I get sucked onto a yoga mat. Monday, I can crank out my June invoices and work on a report from my latest site visit.

Mid-summer already. Dang. Three weeks from now I will be sitting in a field in Hillsdale, NY, staring up at the stars, and thanking the universe for another year.....

I saw something today....

....that made me eternally grateful for the gifts that I have been given. And humbled me incredibly. Wisdom comes, sometimes in unexpected places, sometimes in wholly expected ones. And sometimes, in expected places but in unexpected ways.

Prayers and healing thoughts go out to an acquaintance - one of those persons who might be a close friend had life brought us into closer contact - we click when we are in earshot, but both of our lives are busy and our circles do not overlap too often. I've heard he had a series of strokes and is in the hospital, and it sounds like it will be a long recovery.

June 28, 2006

Toenail Compromise

OK, its summer. Lots of sandals and open toed shoes. And I've got my bare feet on a yoga mat 2-3 times a week. My toes should have something on 'em, if only because I am dristi'd in that direction fairly often.

But I am not to the point of justifying the time and cost of a pedicure, though I really love the pedicures I've had 'em in the past. Just something that keeps getting pushed off in my busy life.

Anyway, I've been a toenail polish DIY'er this summer. All that yoga means I have no problem getting at 'em, anyway.

Ugly Basketball

It's hard to know if the CT Sun were that good, the Houston Comets were that bad, or what. It was not a stellar game. Surprising to me that Nekesha had 19 (for some reason she did not look good during the game, but she still scored). I watched Erin Phillips shooting around, by herself, before the game (lots of 3's from the corners) and still she did not score. The Sun pulled ahead from the start and it was never close (Houston got to maybe 11 or 13 points a few times) - and towards the end it seemed like a pick-up game, with improbable passes, wild shots, and players driving down the lane into traffic just to do something.

The good thing is, not a lot of timeouts and dilly-dallying, and I was back on the highway by 9, and walking in the door before 10.

June 25, 2006

Happy Birthday, Mom!

We had a wonderful celebration of mom's 70th year yesterday, in north central MA. A few weeks late (and a surprise) - mom had been going around for the last two weeks being semi-punked out because none of us made a big thing of it. Heh heh.

It turned out to be wonderful - mom's friends, mom's old coworkers, family, and some distant friends from NJ. My niece put together a scrapbook - old photos, emailed memories, some of mom's favorite mangled sayings aphorisms:

"...smokes like a fish..."
"...doesn;t have two wooden nickels to rub together..."
"...made out like a banshee indian..."

All in all it was wonderful. Props to my dear sister for putting all this together.

While we were browsing the scrapbook, we found (in the work section) a photo of a woman that perked Zippy and I up. Sister? we wondered. My sister chimed in: Oh, she'll be here today, with her partner. We ended up making new friends, who happen to live in the same town as my sister. Shout out to L and K! Except, as Zippy and I discussed on the way home, its hard to meet successful folks (however nice) cause our crappy career paths and dubious financial standing is harder to ignore in comparison.

Today, not much going on. A typical Shankara hot class this morning, with a sneaky heat build up and lots of long poses. For whatever reason, other hot classes seem to be more directly challenging - with a lot of standing, lot of flow. Standing in front of a mountain, pointing to the top. Climb. Shankara's classes are just as challenging and just as hot, they just seem like they should be easier. You start off on a leisurely walk, you seem to meander and dally, but by the end, you are up on the same mountain, wondering how you got up there. He tends to be a stickler for form, and thats always good and challenging by itself. I am blessed to have a variety of classes and instructors to work with (is there an official word for that? sensei? yogi? task-masker?) - I seem to get a little something different from each, and the "surprise" of a slightly different session is always good for balance.

We're relaxing today - I've got laundry going. Picking up MYA in Manchester, taking her to Rainbow Room, then back home to Bristol. Later, Zippy and I are hitting the road - going to the Towne Crier in Pawling to see our friend Victoria play at an open mic.

June 23, 2006

Keep breathing.....

Back from El Paso, but life remains frenetic. I finally did get back into CT around 1:30 am Thursday morning; hit the mattress around 2:00 am. Ugh. I called and cancelled my 7:00 am breakfast appointment, slept in, and Thursday was spent on the mat, in the office, and then over at the WNBA game.

Today, I was planning not to do yoga, but 9:00 am rolled around, I had gotten a bit of work done, so I went anyway. John pretty much drove us into quivering pools of sweat. Good practice. Between all my travels, late hours, a class yesterday, and his heavier than usual class, I pulled back into child's pose a few times - just wiped. No yoga tomorrow (Jazzercise) and maybe not Sunday (ballooning) so I got it out of my system. Right.

Been catching up on work things - caught up on reports, a small El Paso trip report needs to be written, expenses tallied and invoiced. I have a bit website update pending, but got a few smaller site updates completed. Maybe over the weekend.

Meanwhile, my phone keeps ringing - an out of the blue call today might lead to a new client, another from El Paso (maybe ongoing work) and a day trip to Waterbury next week. I'm scrambling to stay ahead of it all. Nice place to be in, at least once the checks for all this hustling come through.....

Right now, rice simmering on the stove, fajita's (leftover chicken, some onion and peppers and mushrooms nearing the end time) staying warm, waiting for Zippy to get home. A mild thunderstorm blew through; the dogs are fretting a little. But the weekend is underway.

June 21, 2006

And back to O'Hare

Well, I made it as far as Chicago - and with delays rampant in the system, my flight from O'Hare to Hartford is also delayed. So a 7:45 departure has slipped to probably 9:30, and if I'm behind the wheel of my Saturn by 1:00 am, I'll consider it a blessing. I just called and cancelled my 7:00 am breakfast meeting; I am gonna need to sleep in....

Not much else to report. Maybe its time for me to sign on for a wireless subscription service - verizon or t-mobile or something. I think I've bought 3 "one day passes" on this trip with all the travel delays and long layovers, and that adds up fast.

Homeward Bound

Not quickly, I might add. Apparently there is weather in the mid-west, and as a result things are delayed. My 2:00 pm out of El Paso is slated for wheels up at 3:55 pm. My connection in O'Hare is already penciled in for a 45 minut edelay (not horrible, it means I will probably make it). So my 10:35 pm arrival back in Hartford is gonna be any time between now and whenever. Ick.

The work went as well as could be expected - I fulfilled my role (being reassuringly competant and consultational) and the fates of grounding smiled upon us (the MR in question was well behaved and showed no signs of errors or problems after the new UPS was connected - although I think most of us involved believe it was the grounding improvements that made things better.

Yesterday was a long one - I was ready to go to the site at 8:30 am - ended up over there at 10:30 am. Made some measurements, had lunch, hung out, then left for my hotel room around 3:00 pm, and returned back to the site at 7:00 pm, where we hung out until nearly 12:30 am. Ugh. Of course I was not able to nap during the day, and Monday and Tuesday nights were not restful or sleepish. So.....tired me.

Tomorrow, I have a 7:00 am breakfast meeting with a client, and a WNBA game in the evening. I am gonna be wiped....

June 20, 2006

Safe in El Paso

Arrived a bit before my scheduled flight - and hit the hotel around 11:00 pm local time, which is 1:00 am my time. YAWN! A little email and geekery to chill, then off to bed. It's been a long day - household stuff, work, yoga, errands, and travel.

Staying at a not so lovely La Quinta - there were two equally priced La Quinta choices and I think I chose poorly. I really *should* have stayed at the Holiday Inn (at about 2x the room rate) but I retain a certain self-employment miserliness that I really need to shed at some point. Especially since my youthful days of being a cowboy are behind me.....(or cowgirl, for that matter). From both a safety/security as well as a creature comfort standpoint, I need to treat myself better.

Oh well, at least the internet is free and reasonably high bandwidth.....

June 19, 2006

Travel Serendipity

En route to El Paso. I arrived to Bradley Airport a bit early; only to find my first flight to DFW was seriously delayed - fatal to get to El Paso this evening. But being htere early, I was able to hop on a flight to ORD - and from there to El Paso an hour early! Now sitting at ORD - the flight to El Paso is delayed but I'll still get in early - and I get to do some geekery.

Also in the serendipitous category; I intended to pick up some magazines to while away the flights (too harried to burn something onto the MP3 player) - nothing worthwhile on the newstand (my usual fare is Harper's, Atlantic Monthly, and/or New Yorker) but instead - a paperback copy of John Irving's new one "Until I Find You". Irving is one of those authors I buy / read everything they have written, eventually (the others are John Updike and Tracy Kidder), and this one has been on the back burner for a while.

We find magic everywhere....

June 18, 2006


Scrabble tonight (me and zippy and a young visitor)

My first word, AMAZONS, with a double word score, off the opening PIE, got me 42 plus a 50 point bonus. Pretty much game over. Bittersweet, kind of fun to make a good word, but disheartening to the other players.

Father's Day

Been over 25 years since I've had a father; my dad died in 1979. It is symptomatic of my father, the role of father's in this culture, and my own journey that my father's death, and the subsequent years, was a mixed thing. Dad was kind, loving, and thoughtful, but distant, and he did not touch my life so directly as I passed through adolescence. When he died, I was angry, I was sad, I was relieved in some ways. The fact that his death was not devastating is perhaps the saddest aspect of the story.

Happy Father's Day, Dad. I wish that you were still around; I'm a lot different person today than I was in 1979. Not sure if our relationship would have survived all of my ups and downs, but sitting here, in 2006, I miss you, a lot.

You died way too young, and I suspect that you had a lot of things in your life that were left unsaid, were unexplored. Thanks for the good start, for making my youth a time of safety and sustenance. I've had so many opportunities, and such a solid foundation; my life is truly wonderful in 2006. You did well. If you are out there, and can let me know, I'll be listening.

Gemini Part Post-mortem

All in all a good party.

Picking up MYA et al, and taking them back in the evening, put a few speed bumps in my day, but they seemed to have a good time. I think MYA's mom is not able to get out among adults all that often, so she really enjoyed it.

We had a good crowd, mixture of people, the last guests left around 11 pm. Our friend Victoria stayed over and left this morning. We have lots of beer and food left over.....

This morning I did a bit of cleaning, did a load of laundry, and caught the hot class. Came home, hung out with Zippy and Victoria, and then bid Victoria a farewell. Zippy and I went to brunch at friends in WH (yummy!) - not relaxing and trying to stay cool.

Tomorrow - work, hit the mat, work, pack - and head out to the airport for a 6 pm flight to El Paso.

June 17, 2006

Prep Work One

Gazpacho assembled and chilling in the fridge - check
Vegan Chili in the crock pot - check
Grill bound protein in a cooler on ice to make room in the fridge - check

June 16, 2006

Gemini Party

So tomorrow is the (in)famous Gemini Party, wherein our smallish house with too much art, too many dogs, and too many catholic saint candles is overrun by a few score of our family and friends to celebrate the birth of all Gemini's, not the least of which is my girlfried the Zipster. Should be a fun day. The weather bodes well, food has been purchased, a small stock of beer and hard lemonade set in along with a bunch of soda and bottled water. We've run around cleaning like madwomen.

Might try to get to Jazzercise tomorrow, along with:

a) Making vegetarian chili (mostly a mix, so not a big deal)
b) Making Gazpacho (pretty much gonna wing it)
c) Getting ice for the beverages.

Addicted to Yoga

It's Friday morning, and yoga does not make a lot of sense today. I've already been to two power classes this week, I have a bunch of reports to get out, I have to pick up Finch at the airport at 1:15. We have lots of cleaning and organizing and shopping and preparing to do pre-Gemini party. I can probably sneak in Jazzercise tomorrow, and hot classes Sunday and Monday.

So, no, Friday yoga does not make sense.


June 15, 2006


We are T-minus 56 hours from the social event of the summer. It's crunch time. Everything will get done, although I am not 100% sure how at the moment. We still have a bunch of cleaning to do, I need to clean the grill and refill the propane, I need to shop for soda, some token alcohol, supplies, and food.

As in most cases, its pretty much of a free-for-all in terms of attendance. I think there are 40 or 50 people who have been invited, odds are many will not show, but enough will to make it interesting. Family heavy (Zippy's mom and dad, my mom, various sibs). Musicians. Co-workers. MYA is coming (expected) and so is her mom and brothers (not expected) which should be interesting. (Also, means I need to go get them and take them home, slightly awkward being thats it our party and all)

The good part is that we are getting a lot of things done that have piled up; our annual spring cleaning. I went through the back porch like a whirlwind, tossing, organizing, processing. Five boxes of kitchen stuff got compacted onto two shelves. A box of books got sent to Los Angeles to Zippy's niece. Two other boxes got moved to the basement. New curtains got bought for the bathroom. Stuff like that.

Meanwhile, work has gotten busy, with a bunch of reports in queue. And I am still gonna sneak out today to hit the mat and to go to a movie with MYA. Or maybe I should blow off the movie and drag her along to do party errands......hmm.....

June 14, 2006

Overheard in Hartford

On Sound Off Connecticut, with Jim Vicevich, around 11:30 am this morning. Caller Richard, in discussing the Philadelphia story about Geno's Cheese Steaks and his English Only Sign, said:

"....one language is what 'E Pluribus Unum' is all about...." (I'm paraphrasing, but it was pretty close to this)

Apparently, Latin has been acquired by English in a hostile takeover.....

Juiced Soccer Ball

Why Goalies Hate the New World Cup Soccer Ball

Kind of funny that the one piece of equipment that is used for this sport can be so significantly altered without a huge uproar of protest and controversy.

I compare this to the gear-heavy sports (baseball, football, golf) where equipment is tested and sanctioned, and there is a lot of controversy when anything changes.

I also wonder if this is a conscious effort on the part of soccer to woo the American audience. If the new ball promotes more goals, and the biggest isssue with American proto-fans is not enough scoring / action, too many nil-nil games, maybe the new ball will help.....

Dumbing down soccer?

June 13, 2006

Women's Hoops

Go here now. I think its gonna be regular reading from now on; a really nice summary of what's going on in the WNBA and elsewhere.

More work - More work - More work

We're in a fever pitch of busy-ness with the impending weekend festivities. Today, I cleaned out the back porch (a main socializing area and crucial in case of rain) and brought up a lot of chairs and coolers. Tomorrow I need to fetch tables from the storage hole. Maybe clean the grill. Maybe fetch propane.

Hit the mat today; I was contemplating a gentle class (my gutters / lawn / siding scrubbing / sweeping antics of Monday, capped by Jazzercise, had left me somewhat achey), but I sucked it up and went to power, and all was well.

Somehow I have gotten all the way into June without actually exporting anything from my online backing accounts into my accounting software, so I spent a few hours doing that - exporting it all, balancing things, etc. Nuisance, but its all caught up. Tomorrow I may actually do some filing and start to do some office organizing and cleaning.

Oh, and I am heading back out to El Paso next Mon-Wed.

June 12, 2006

Maybe Not Such a Rest

I worked Friday night and Sunday, so I deserved a day around the house. Productive one, however.

This morning I cleaned out the gutters on the back of the house, swept the porch roof, and, in a moment of inspiration / genius / perspiration, decided to scrub the siding (aluminum) which had become both dirty and sporadically green (alga / moss along the bottom). Buckets of all purpose cleaner and hot water, a scrub brush on a pole, a ladder, a hose, and a bunch of scrubbing - and the back of the house is MUCH more presentable. It's incredible how much better it looks. Go me.

In the afternoon, I cut the lawn, which had not really overgrown despite all the rain, swept the walks and drive, and got all the garbage into the bin for pick-up tomorrow. In between, I went into work to do a couple of reports, picked up a check, and went to the bank.

On another note, today was "get stuff in the mail day". I got a self-help book delivered to the office. I got a couple of books from Amazon (Leslie Feinberg's "Drag King Dreams" and Alison Bechdel's new graphic's novel memoir "Fun Home", a birthday gift for the Zipster). And we received a package from Zippy's brother with our new custom painted toilet seat.

Catching My Breath

Finally, the busy weekend ends.

Zipster and I traveled down to Mohegan Sun yesterday; I had a WNBA game (Sun vs. Mystics). Zippy came down to watch and then we went to see Suede at the Wolf Den.

The game was good; the first half was really tight but the Sun opened it up in the second half. KT and Nykesha both had great games. Lindsey Whalen was definitely off (the Mystics guards really did a number on her, defensively). Zippy was semi into it; she's not a huge fan of sound pollution and all the between play antics was a bit much, along with sitting near some screamers (she moved back a few rows to a quieter seat)

The Wolf Den concert was great - we were right up front. Vickie Shaw opened up: ""I'm Texan by birth, lesbian by Grace, and if you see Grace tell her I said hi," She was pretty darn funny. Suede was all that and a bag of chips. I've heard great things about her from friends but this is the first time I have had the chance to see her. The Wolf Den space was pretty nice; I think I've been a bit reluctant to go to shows there because I just never made it over there. Now I get it.

However, last season I never actually put so much as a quarter into a slot machine; and this season looks no different. I'm kind of perversely proud of that.

The audience was pretty much wall-to-wall dyke, although we ended up sitting next to two straight couples (father and son, and girlfriend and wife respectively). Not surprising (the dykes) considering the WNBA game just let out. The casino and team do not really openly market to or make a big thing about the lesbian crowd, but you can bet they know we are there. Amusingly, I beat Zippy to the Wolf Den entance despite having to finish up the game stuff and go the bathroom and head up from the basement; she got a little lost in the casino. The noise, the lights, the maze, the dull throbbing of slot machines all made her slightly quesy and headachey. Not a casino going girl. We got home around 9:30; a friend had come over to watch the dogs.

Now the busy week starts; with a lot of cleaning and organizing and preparation for next Saturday.

June 11, 2006

Happy Anniversary

Mom and Dad tied the knot on this day in 1960. I was born 8 months and 29 days later.

Dad died in 1979, and we sort have let the date slip all these years, in a sort of awkward "do not want to remind mom of her loss" kind of way, but its nice to remember it. I'm here because they got hitched and decided to have kids. Thanks, mom and dad!

Weekend Warrior

Never let it be said I let a little relaxation come between me, a Friday, and a Monday. Sheesh.

Friday I ended up on the mat in the morning, worked a bit during the day, then off to the WNBA game (the Sun beat the Seattle Storm 85-81, they were pretty handily ahead most of the game but let the Storm sneak up on them to make the final 2 minutes a bit exciting). UCONN alumni Sue Bird and Barbara Turner were in the house with the Storm, which got the fans out. Again, pretty even scoring by the Sun starters; Ashja Jones, starting for Taj who is was doing family stuff, had 14. Not a great game for Erin Phillips.

Saturday, I hit Jazzercise for the first time all week (the film fest kept me away a lot of the week) and then we shopped a bit. In the afternoon, we went to a screening of the film Hearts Cracked Open (Lesbian Tantra Documentary). The film was great, although the room was a bit bright (a spectacular skylight in the space, and the sun emerged for the first time in many days). Afterwards, we attended a workshop with Betsy Kalin (filmmaker) which was very good, and then after that we did dinner at Alchemy Juice Bar with Betsy and her friend. Yummy. Why has Alchemy not become one of my favorite places in Hartford? The food was delish as was the vibe. As close to Reader's Feast in terms of vibe as I can recall. I had a yummy mexican vegetarian platter with the prerequisite rice and beans; Zippy got short-changed; with a tofu platter with mostly salad. She wanted that honking pile of carbs....

So we did the tantra triple header: film, workshop, and dinner, then back home ot feed the dogs. The sun finally emerged and we were not particularly wiped, so we jumped in the car to head to Milford, for a house concert with Namoli Brennet. We missed a lot of if (it apparently started outside and was moved in due to the cold) but got to hear a few songs, then got to hang out later. She's the real thing, kids. She's nominated for a slew of awards at tonight's OutMusic Awards - so send positive karma. We rolled home around midnight.

Today; I slept in a bit (6 am was dog feeding time, I went back to bed until past 7) - now I am contemplating some more mat time, and then we are off to MoSun for the Sun game vs. teh Washington Mystics, and a Suede concert afterwards in the Wolf Den. Another long day for us; I'm sort of used to beating myself up but Zippy has a bit less stamina, so I'm hoping she holds up.

Finally, the sun has emerged; yesterday afternoon the front came through (judging by the wind) and it was sunny for the drive down to Milford yesterday. Today its looks great out. Huzzah! Monday, methings I will be pushing a lawn mower around; its been a solid week of rain and as soon as the sun hits the grass its gonna grow 3"

June 09, 2006

Terry Rand Thrice

Hey, there *is* an official Terry Rand website: www.terryrand.150m.com. Got this comment from the source:
The Hungry Tiger gig has been postponed until September. Working on updating my website to reflect the recent change in the bands lineup. Thanks for the support. Current web address is: www.terryrand.150m.com
Terry Rand

Methinks the Sept 30th Pine Loft gig is in the past, since the Pine Loft had been borgified by Dunkin Donuts last time I was by (it's a semi-regular stop on my way to Mohegan Sun)

June 08, 2006


You get to a point in life where death makes its presence known, more frequently.

Odd really. I've dwelt in the shadow of death for a long time. My father's death in 1979, when I was 18, has colored my entire adult life. I had my mid life crisis at 27 or thereabouts; exactly 1/2 way to my father's lifespan. And in earlier times I glared at death with a false bravado and machismo: "You want some of this? come get it......" I'd have to do the math; but I am his age or a little older now. I am happy to say I feel a lot healthier and more invested in life to welcome death at this age. I am sure, however, that were I to have followed a different path I might be closer to death.

Despite the early initiation into the land of bereavement, death has not been nearby in my life for many years - other than distant grandparents and family pets. More machismo, I feel a perverse sense of responsibility and bravado when it comes time to put a pet down; staying in the room as Kyla, then Nipsy, then Mauzie were put to sleep, cradling and comforting them, sobbing uncontrollably, walking away full of feeling. Emotional yoga; practicing for other larger deaths, tasting mortality.

But, there is change in the air. Celebrities and musicians that I consider to be peers or of my generation are dying. (Thinking a bit of Neil Young's Heart of Gold movie, of Warren Zevon) My uncles and aunts are older and starting to have chronic health issues. Beloved older figures (like Canon Jones) are dying, not unexpectedly, its just time. Too soon, death will be a more familiar spectre in my life.

Just witnessing my own process, I guess. We're celebrating my mom's 70th birthday this year - and suddenly my mom seems less "advanced middle aged" and more "active senior citizen". My mom's family is having a reunion in late July; normally it conflicts with my annual retreat to the Falcon Ridge Folk Festival, but this year it's a week off. So despite having WNBA games on Friday night and Sunday, Zippy and I are gonna fly down (Huzzah for Southwest) on Saturday morning, drive from Baltimore to Lancaster PA, go to the reunion, stay overnight, and fly back on Sunday morning. An expensive and harried 30 hour vacation, but something tells me it might be the last time I see some of my relatives.

Hey death. I know you are out there.....just letting you know....

June 07, 2006

Goodbye, Canon

Canon Jones funeral today; an oddly uplfting affair. When one lives to a ripe old age, when one goes quickly, when one has done so much good work and touched so many lives - it is hard to be sad at a funeral. The tears that came to my eyes were of joy and of thanks for having crossed paths with the man, and of some sadness for all mortality - but not for Canon Clinton Jones.

It was a large crowd at Christ Church Cathedral, on a dreadful day - rainy and blustery. At the end, when the clergy from all faiths convened in the aisles for the closing prayer, the aisle was full. He was truly respected, admired, and loved. It was a beautiful, and strong, and loving service.

I was a wee bit disappointed in the tribe - of the 100's (400? 500? more?) persons who have passed through GICNE, perhaps 10 of us were evident. More evidence that simply getting through the process, surviving it all, does not guarantee you the sort of stable and happy life where one can pull it together long enough to honor a man who has done so much to help. Were we not there from fear? from wanting to put it all behind us? or were our lives simply so inwardly focused, or too difficult, or perhaps painful that coming to the funeral was not possible? I'm crossing into dangerous blog territory here, and I will let it go at that.

And one last thought, irreverent. But there are some very cute women priests in the Episcopal ranks.

Connecticut Sun and Boxing?

Apparently, the Connecticut Sun are doing some pugilistic cross-training to enhance their upper body strength and explosive speed. Story here

As if I needed additional reasons to be intimidated by these women ::grin::

June 05, 2006

In other news

It's been a busy few days. Not a lot of time to blog.

Friday night was the film fest; we got home late for normal folk (12:30 am) which is unheard of for we of the "in bed by 9 or 10" set. Saturday I Jazzercise'd, then quickly home, shower, and off to the CT Sun's game.

The Charlotte Sting played it pretty close for the first half, at which point the Sun kicked it in for a pretty handy win. Balanced scoring by the starters (Dydek had 17/ Whalen and Douglas each had 14, Sales and Taj each had 12), good bench support by Asjha Jones, Erin Phillips, and others. About the only thing of note was the EVS operator thought the game was at 7 and had to get called in; she sat down at her bench literally as the tip-off started. My end of things went pretty smoothly.

After the game, we watched a bit of a documentary on GLBT film history before falling asleep; I woke late on Sunday (8 am) just in time to hustle off to yoga. After that; we had a bit of a fight, and I ended up emptying the dining room to clean the floors, walls and woodwork, as well as the kitchen floor. Then off to another busy afternoon - bought guitar strings, picked up MYA, had dinner, went to rainbow room with her (where I restrung my guitar), took her home, then off to the yoga studio to practice for Kirtan (Friday, June 9). The practice went well; I need to get some chant CD's to learn the chord changes but I think I will fit in OK with the ensemble; my rhythm playing, intuitive and improvisational experiences work well with what is a loosely scripted accompaniment, and my desire to take a back seat is a good fit with an ensemble that already has some talented and strong personalities.

Sadly, I will not be a part of the June 9th Kirtan (work conflict) but I am looking forward to the fall. I left the studio a bit before 11 feeling very good about participating.

I came home, however, to a bit of a tempest. Zippy and I are not connecting; and my busy-ness and lack of availability are a huge part of that. We talked for a while last night; her issues of abandonment and neglect overlap with my drive to be busy. We agreed to commit to cooking one meal together per week (no books for her, no internet for me) and to doing one fun thing (shopping, movie, film). And to work on intimacy. We need to make more room for each other and for our relationship; we're coasting but not thriving.

Along those lines, tonight we're going to the GLBT film festival together. And Saturday, a documentary called Hearts Cracked Open, A Documentary Film about Tantra for Women Who Love Women, will be shown at Alchemy Juice Bar. The film may impact our ability to go to a party this weekend (either on time or at all) and that sucks (its a fun party, good friends and good people) but Zippy and I have been struggling with intimacy for a while and we had wanted to see this film the last time it came to town, and missed it. In the parlance; we are fastening our own oxygen masks before helping others.....its very important for us to reconnect physically; more important than anything.

And with that - my work week officially starts....

Canon Clinton Jones

A great and good man passed away yesterday. Canon Clinton Jones has died, apparently of pancreatic cancer, at the age of 89.

I cop to it now and then; I am a transsexual woman. And Canon Jones was founder of and involved in the Gender Identity Clinic of New England (GICNE) when I was transitioning. So I got to know him, a little bit. He was a good, kind, and gentle man; the world needs more of his kind in the service of organized religion.

I have three Canon Jones stories; none of which is representative of his life or his good work, just three little snippets where our lives intersected.

Early in my process; I was aware of my trans nature but was trying very hard not to transition; having some serious moral and ethical concerns about medical intervention, and hoping to come to terms with this or find a point of balance shy of medical and legal transition. I would visit the local transsexual support group; testing the waters. Sadly, at that time, I was perceived by the members of the group, and by Canon Jones, to be a just a crossdresser - not to be taken seriously. He can be forgiven for his old-school ways; he had been working with transsexual persons for 30 years at that point and had formed some opinions; and goodness knows the world has changed since he first started to minister to this population. But my path was slightly harder for finding no support in that space for my path of reluctant transition.

Later, when I did approach GICNE for support (I needed official medical sanction to access transition related medical services) I met with Canon Jones for an interview, and I later met with him at a board meeting seeking approval to start hormones. At that meeting, he commented to the nervous and slightly over-cross-dressed woman in front of him "Well, you have one thing going for you....." I waited for some comment about my hair (which was full and curly despite 40 years of a testosterone based endocrine system) but instead he simply said "you have a very nice voice". It was a wonderful thing to say; I have always been somewhat shy about my voice. Perhaps in that small exchange I picked up some confidence.

Finally, after I had transitioned, Zippy and I were in the front row of the balcony at the Bushnell, at the opera (darned if I can remember which one). Sitting across the aisle from us, also in the front row, were Canon Jones and a woman friend. We caught his eye and waved, and at the intermission, visited for a bit. He seemed genuinely interested and happy that my life was going well. I remember riding down the elevator with him after the performance (Zippy was recovering from a cracked pelvis from getting hit by a car) and laughing; in a carload full of octogenarians, I was the tallest thing on the bus.

Canon Clinton Jones, godspeed. Thank you for your years of work and dedication. I hope that you have received rewards both during your time on this earth, and in the afterlife.

June 03, 2006

By their logo's you shall know them

CT Gay and Lesbian Film Fest last evening. Great films, and a nice reception afterwards. Who's the Top in particular was, quite....er....nice. And Queens (spanish) was fabulous and funny.

We met two lesbian women (not a couple, pretty sure) - they approached us due to Zippy's Falcon Ridge shirt, and later I realized one of them was wearing a CT Sun hat (#13 - Lindsey Whalen) which provided another conversation starter (they go to a lot o fthe home games). We exchanged info - so maybe some new friends.

Mostly, Zippy had a ball hanging out and dishing with gay men.

June 02, 2006

Back in the USA

Escaped from Toronto. The meeting went a bit long (extended Q&A) and a major US conglomerate has successfully acquired another company in the clean water category. I drove the entire trip from Toronto to Hartford; my traveling companion got to nap and work, I got to play with the shiny, glittery GPS based dashboard navigation system. We made good time; I walked in the door before 8:30 pm.

In the medical imaging field, my primary work industry, this company has acquired a few companies that I and my clients do business with (Lunar, Imatron, etc) - there seems to be a Star Trek "Borg" comparison out there amongst the field service folks. You will be assimilated. We've joked about the data port being surgically implanted.

It can be frustrating as a consultant / supplier. My clients find that the big company sourcing people are really good at turning the cranks to drop costs - but sometimes turn a high value-added product into a commodity. This sometimes means they take a partner-developed, high value design, bid it out to a company that may not be fully competant, but is willing to low-ball to do high volume business. 2-3 years later when said company is driven out of business, the big boy comes back knocking on the door. It's not fatal, just annoying. I tend to advise: walk away when they come looking to slash prices to the point of pain; no sense losing money, and they will come back a little humbler after they destroy their low cost vendors.

Speaking of clean water, I was amused to find American Standard commodes in Canada. I guess in the continental sense it's still America. But I kind of wanted to find Canadian Standard or something.....I dunno. All in all, Toronto is way too similar to a USA city for my taste, Church Street notwithstanding.....between credit cards and getting my meals paid for by my client and the ubiquity of USA currency, I never even touched a Canadian coin or bill....

Back home and trying to get back into my routine - work today and some yoga, Jazzercise and a WNBA game tomorrow. I need to get my June 1st invoices out as well as a bunch of power reports that have piled up.

Zippy has been trying to order a higher end dehumidifier (Comfort-Aire, model BHD-651) for the basement for many moons; I finally went online, found the right make / model online (Ace Hardware Outlet via ebay) and ordered it for UPS delivery. I think my inner stone butch comes out in matters of retail expediency. Just order the damn thing, and stop futzing around.

I had really weird dreams last night - odd for me. Lots of peripheral people and semi-famous in my life were there. Hockey was involved. Food was involved. Really odd and vivid.

Terry Rand Band Again

Another missive from Peter Anthony. Since "Terry Rand" and "Neybas" seems to be fairly popular search terms for those looking stumbling in here, its pretty evident to me that Scenic Root is the closest thing these folks have to a website. So....

Dear friends,

This Saturday, the band I've been rehearshing in has our first full gig. We're going to be at La Boca in Middletown, a fine Mexican restaurant that's a bit of an intriguing rabbit warren of a place. One of the burrows leads to the band, the Terry Rand Band, to be precise. We'll be there from about 9pm and playing til the end (of course we'll be there earlier, but there'll be setting up going on, etc).

The restaurant is on Main Street. I think all of you have seen me at Klekolo at one time or another. Well, it's just near there.

I'll be playing bass and singing harmony, yes, harmony. We're doing Terry's songs and a few select covers that reflect our exquisite taste, etc, so I don't think there'll be much soloing going on and it is a bar, after all. But you never know.

And, speaking of bars--we'll be at the Hungry Tiger two weeks after that: Saturday 17th under roughly the same time deal. Lesebuch (editor: huh?)

I'd love to see you at one of these, we've been having a lot of fund: It's Terry on rhythm and lead vocals, Rich Gordon on guitar and Bob Bowmar keyboards with Emmet Hale, fromerly of the Neybas, keeping us all together on drums.

I think you'll like it--I do!
All the best, ya'll,

Editorial Comments: La Boca does not have the June entertainment listings online and the Hungry Tiger seems to have Jive Miquel listed for the 17th. And I'm less likely to be at the La Boca gig (I work and a friend might be visiting the game and doing dinner apres) but maybe the Hungry Tiger......